the revolt in revolution

I do not like revolution, not really. I am not a fanatic at the fringe just waiting for the Revelations to occur and the fire to fall from the heavens. I do not want to race about hacking things off or, god forbid, raping anything that I can shove my penis into. No. I am particular where I guide my penis into. It is a smart penis, I mean this in the trademarked sense; comparable to the guided missiles are often ballyhooed can sent through a window. This is, apparently, a testament to its accuracy. I tell you, my penis is more accurate than that and doesn’t get half the press. I digress.

When I think of the glee, that some write about, about the devolvement of the individual, mostly men, into are worst energies. A sort of gelatinous goo of reified testosterone and bad parenting. I am puzzled. Oh, I have felt this a time or two, mostly when I was salting slugs or blasting bugs under a rock with pilfered Black Cat firecrackers. I see that glee. But if I look at it, it is only the glee of a particularly cruel child that I believe all of us have been once or twice or thrice in our lives. Some of us continue to be one, or to live off of this particular energy, but most of us, I believe, move on to some other form of melancholy.

What one is left with if they believe that humans will act this way is the belief that one does not act accordingly in high stress or chaotic environments. In my experience people become more themselves when they are in a chaotic environment, it is a magnifying experience. They do not become other than themselves but more themselves. Our systems in place, and large portions if not entirely luck, have made it so that this magnification of our beings is necessary but muted. The coward at our job is cowardly in a small, silly way, the sadist is sadistic in similar ways. Oh it can be in larger ways when one garners more power, but individually one cannot sway enough to do it in a large scale. One needs a idealogy and willing acolytes to do this. But the individual, Stalin etc., by his bare hands could not engage this cruelty larger than his finite animated corpse could touch.

This coward or sadist when the environment collapses the system then magnifies their personalities, or at least, from my experience and what I have read, this becomes the case. The coward is Coward, the sadist, the Sadist. However, in my experience most people are more neutral than that, a long swatch of neutral. Not that they haven’t chosen a side but the very act of not choosing becomes a side. A monumental blandness. This again does not mean that they cannot be ‘fun’ or even say a witty thing or two. My goodness, just look what goes for politicians-you haven’t met a more witty bunch of folks who can party like no tomorrow.

The danger of this blandness as a side is that it becomes forgetful of its own self. The constituent parts of the system, which are the system, start believing, because of their stunning self imposed impotence, their impotence. The system rises as ruler and reality. This reality and ruler has to perpetually move, it is in motion all the time because the factual nature of the lack of a ‘system’ that is apart from the ‘parts’ but the masses must have it. So they put such huge efforts in believing it. This goes from large systems such as governing states to smaller like communities.

My neighbor once told me, as we first moved in, the only brown folks in the neighborhood,

“We don’t do that here,” in regards to a request to my neighbor to be quieter in their parties on a Thursday night. I did not tell him explicitly that I work until 10 with either my ill father, paid work, or my children-and that a wall rattling bass is not conducive to my sleep. I replied,

“I am always skeptical of one that tries to pit me against a ‘we’. I don’t know you, let alone my neighbors, yet, and until I do I will not give you that point. The, We, when it is not done correctly, honorably, or honestly, if it is not based on a virtue respecting the absolute worth of both parties, then it is a hateful thing. It is a thing that even when it doesn’t cause genocide, murder, rape, is the system in which it will happen. The ‘we’ of no responsibility is the ‘we’ that has killed untolds of innocents.”

I must admit that he had said, ‘we don’t do that here,’ to my wife and I had three days to prepare my answer to him.

So that is the system we have. The We, the We of inaction, the We of bland acceptance, the We of herculean effort to become enslaved by a hypothetical conception. It is because of this that there must be a revolution to reshape, for a time, that actual systemic way of thought. If one will not accept this individual revolution and enough individuals refuse, then the blandness must be used to be able to sway them from their current infatuation with another better one (best is only possible through the individual).

When is this to be done?

The term revolt is within the term revolution. At least to me. It is here that I am confronted with the idea of revolt. This revolt is not based upon some passionate, heated, emotion. In fact, I would say, that for the most, it cannot be. Passion, in its existent form, is unstable. It ebbs and it flows, and yet the sustainability of such a level of vehemence is highly unlikely. Revolt, I would better say, is based upon a deep disdain and, to a certain level, dynamic disgust. I say dynamic here because the nature of reality is that it is eternally dynamic and this dynamism is only bounded in the name of efficiency and practicality-I do not rename my child each moment even though they are not the same person, even biologically, they were 1 second ago.

A dynamic disgust coupled with disdain (a more stable emotion) are the twin roots of revolt. To be revolted at something, a system, needs refreshing, because it is rather vehement term (not necessarily passionate-I am revolted by chunky vomit but I am not passionate about this revolt). This refreshing comes from the dynamism of a particular system, education for example, and the effects that come from this systemic causation. I am revolted by nearly everything that comes out of it. I have dynamic disgust whenever something ‘new’ comes from it. That this system is arisen from a causation that causes me a great deal of disdain for it is the more stable emotion that remains. Disdain.

This disdain has lead me to the thought that this system is no longer tenable in any moral or humane way. It cannot be ‘reformed’ in how this is normally defined. Reformation from a subversive (working within a systems construct to be an opposition force within the system) standpoint is not useful in this way because the rot is entire, it needs to come down. When revolt leads us down this path to this realization it leaves us with the answer of Revolution.

It is interesting, to me, that this both means the revolt of someone, somethings, against a dominant whatever as well as to go around, to revolve. Because something revolves does not, inherently, mean that one arrives at the same spot in a larger scope. It is all perspective and reference points. For example, a car tire revolves when it drives but the car, if it is the point of reference, is not in the same place as it was previously when the wheel made one full revolution.

We live in an era of almost immediate change, at least in the West. But we are a creature of a different time with the capacity to give the impression of changing-but we are not happy within this change. There is a difference between falling within the spectrum of change that allows for a positive growth of an individual and the act of survival that is outside of that spectrum. Because both individuals have similar biological features; the breath, they eat, they work, does not mean these individuals are the same.

We must revolt. In our small and large ways. In our disdain for what is even called ‘ideal’ within this system we must. It does not have to be this way.

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Xanga is closing, xanga is closing, it is closed. It was the first and only place where I blogged, wrote, exchanged ideas with some amazing people. I am a skeptic of technology and almost all of my positive experiences with it have been through this blog. I cherish those few that have kept in contact with me. I am thankful for those that spent even a brief moment looking at what I wrote. That anyone would spend their time giving me the time of day, especially in area that are difficult to express, has been a powerful current in my life. Their insight, beautiful minds, and poetic natures have done wonders for my often melancholy personality.

Monkegeist
mag_1
Amoralis
Warholian_napalm
malikmran
Roninism
edg176
swirling spiral
Diggitydawg
an-OM-aly

and anyone who went anonymous on my writing, I thank you. I do not know if you could know how much I appreciated an eye to some of my thoughts.

I will post at both sites for awhile until xanga closes. I changed my URL to ariseguru, because, I do not think fallenguru is appropriate now. To be honest, I think I have arisen from what I had thought was a terminal blow. I thought I would never arise. The deep distress at what I had thought was life had left me destroyed, razed, and ready to mimic a life. I have found this way out, a way, and have taken my first attempts at walking what I have found to be true. They can be none other than difficult, bumbling, and often leading to a fall. But I am no longer 'fallen' in the past tense. The past tense of it being a place of infinite rest (much different than eternal rest-eternal rest takes transcendence which I do want). I get up. The stride is wobbly, like I was when I first learned to walk but, eventually, despite the oddity of my gait, I did learn to walk.

I will leave you will something I wrote about 7 years ago on xanga. One of my first posts.

Posted 12/19/2006 at 3:7 PM

I have understood that I was misleading myself for so long. I have made the mistake of sublimating my individuality. It does not seem to be this way if you were to talk to someone like myself. I have ideas and methodologies but most of my ideas stretch from the debunked theory of George Bush (the first one) with his trickle down economics. It is not economics that I talk about, or not exclusively, but it is the idea that the grand scheme of things comes first; the problems with politics, the wars, the poverty of the third world. I do not want one to think that these do not matter, they do matter, they are blots on the map of our existence. However, the mistake that I have made and have continued to make for some time, and at times still do, is to put myself in a position of impotency. What can one do against the awesome tide of evil in this world? If it is viewed in the scope of a totality (or what we think is a totality) then it is unbearable to stare at. It grinds the will into a malleable dust that is washed away with its current.

I love history, or it is one of the loves that I have in my life, I have often said that my hobby is as a generalist, and I am apt to sit with the very few friends that I have that will put up with such a dry subject (to most). We discuss the tides of history and marvel at the similar wave like patterns that ripple out throughout history. I call them waves and not a cycle because each arrival of the historical 'similarity' is not identical so it is more wave like then cyclical like. This marvel though is one who sits on the sideline, the consumer if you will. Thomas Jefferson would have lamented at this idealogy as he wanted the US to drive toward a agrarian production society. I thought on this and instead of using History as a painting to glare at and poke holes at, to use as a screen to glare and poke holes at our present time, I should use it as an impetus to influence the current history, or the 'to be' history. I am not vain enough to think that my mediocre intellect or talent would lead a charge down any path of historical significance directly but if one thinks about cause and effect we are not sure what cause will lead to what end. It is much as the Butterfly Effect example has on Chaos Theory, we matter. You must think of it, we ultimately matter, each cause has ripple effects across a pattern of effect and we cannot be sure how it moves movements in one direction or another. It is paramount that we remove ourselves as much as we can from this flow (cause no harm) until we are aware of our immense worth, limitless worth, even the least among us (as the Christ said) can do, or be the catalyst to miracles or anti miracles for lack of a better term. I used to think there was neutral causes, or Karma, but I no longer believe that. Each action from eating to sleeping has an effect without awareness we can cause unknowing good, but I would say that this is a rarity, mostly unawareness brings forth suffering. I say this because of the examples of my own life and throughout history, it takes care and focus to be able to overcome the natural slide of entropy, I think that it is that way with good. I think awareness of each step of each heartbeat can slowly allow oneself on the path to chip away at the grime that covers our true natures (entropy slides us to the grime, awareness leads us on a path that can rid ourselves of this and then I believe all paths will supersede the natural entropy and become Super mundane that leads back to Truth).

I don't want to get too religious or to speak in spiritual terms but most of what I speak on has those overtones but it is truly practical. It can be seen by an unbeliever as well. That is why I use scientific terms such as entropy for one who understands that in order for entropy to be put off energy must be put into the system. That is what I must remember. Also cause and effect, if we use any instance we can see that it has an ocean of cause and effect behind it, the abuser is a good example. We know that most abusers were abused (the opposite of this equation is not true however) and that is one cause of their hateful actions, just following this line we can see that it probably stretches back eons, eons of suffering, then we take into account all else, i.e. anger, wrong mates, organic mental deficiencies: where does this come from? It comes from not eating right, drugs where does this come from? This questioning goes on and on. Who then is responsible? We are, ultimately, we have a choice at the points of where our causes lead us to, we have internal choices on how we let we let the instance become 'real' or not in our life. 'Real' is a manifestation of our thought and not an independent truth.

Let's get back to the individual. I think of History, or our current state in the grand trickle down manner. I also have found that I think of systems this way, and it has to change. I must view it through the lens of cause and effect, through awareness, and through myself. I must view history as not unchanging monolithic inevitabilities but as pictures that come out of the masses of pixels that have driven it toward that vision. Truly what we view, what we ingest, is what we make of it. I have read a book on Active Reading and it stated that Active Reading is an art form. It takes the information and communications symbols of the author and then goes through the palette of the individuals mind and its constituents; sub, super, and conscious consciousness. Thus the end product is the readers and becomes something whole and new.

If we see ourselves as important, in fact, integral causes or effects in a systems manifestation then we can be active in our relationships to this. If we are aware of this, if we remain aware, the suffering of impotence will die. The virility of action with our wisdom of the situation can marry each other into conscious striving. This is mandatory in order to be good, to live at the very bare minimum of goodness which I define as to cause no harm, or as little as possible. We know the unconscious lifestyles so rarely cause good, so rarely that it does not even have to be measured, and so often causes bad and suffering. Be the individual, understand that it is in this manifestation that you grasp ahold of your life, of the world, of the universe, of systems of history. Look, as I do, at the histories, of economies, of any large vision of systems but realize their pixels are what make the illustration possible, without any of them it would not arise as it is. I look at this last sentence and I don't think it is quite accurate, I use the term pixel but it is more. The illustration is a nexus of smoke, or fog, it is where there is no wind. It arises and hovers as if it were solid to one that views it from the top, each and every being is a wind, each wind brought that smoke there and by canceling out each other the smoke is allowed to rise, if one was not there the opposite force would blow the vision into a blur. It is more like this.

The all powerful individual, manifestor of the universe and the gods that inhabit it, it is the duty of the individual to seek out to destroy itself and view the All in the luminosity of the Truth. It can only be done by accepting the yoke of awareness and individuality.

Be One
to be Many